As the holidays approach I get many inquiries from singles who don't want to be lonely while their family and friends are cozily spending quality time together. These singles don't want to be alone during the holidays, they want to have fun with someone! So I got creative. If you're single and want to have fun with someone over the holidays (or any other time) here are five ways you can get a date within 24 hours. One qualifier. in Conscious Dating a "fun" date is recreational dating, the purpose of which is to have fun, not find a long term partner, therefore anyone fun qualifies. Therefore, you don't need to carefully choose someone who is highly aligned with your requirements and highly attractive to you.
The hard part of recreational dating is keeping it fun and not getting involved. Believe it or not, it's easiest to do this with someone that clearly is not a good match for you! With that qualifier in mind here are some ideas- 1. Date your Ex Got your attention? It's not as crazy as you might think! If you have a cordial relationship with an ex, why not? You know each other well and know how to have fun together. 2. Date out of your league We get so focused on finding "the one," wouldn't it be fun to take a break and date someone significantly older or younger, of a different race or gender, etc, than usual? Recreational dating is easiest when it's with people we clearly wouldn't choose for long term, so how about dating someone dramatically different from your usual pattern? 3. Post a contest on Craig's List "Win a date with me!" contest.
Entrants submit a description of what they propose to do on their date with you, and you choose the one that seems the most fun. People cruise Craig's List and similar online communities for things to do, places to go, and people to meet. DO NOT use this strategy for anything other than recreational dating! (see above qualifier). 4.
Date a "loser" I know I'm going to get flak for this one. but search personal ads for the most pathetic lost soul you can find who would be happy to go out for a little fun and let loose, knowing it's a one-time thing. Someone who you wouldn't ordinarily consider dating in a million years.
Who knows? You might have fun and learn something about yourself and the human race. 5. Date a family member or friend Wouldn't it be nice to have fun with one of your kids, your brother or sister, mother or father, or a friend? Take this opportunity to get to have fun with them and get to know them better by breaking your usual pattern with them and go out to a dinner and play, etc. No need to be alone during the holidays or at any other time if you're not picky.
If you're lonely, use these strategies to have fun! Want More Than "Fun?" If these strategies don't appeal to you and you want more than fun, you want a relationship, then take care of yourself by not settling for less and continue your quest for your life partner. In the meantime, I recommend spending quality time with your family and friends, and perhaps widening your social circle by making new friends. Not only will this help you get your social and emotional needs met while you're single, but here's a secret. most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know!.
David Steele, MA, LMFT is founder of Relationship Coaching Institute and author of the ground-breaking new book for singles Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today's World
